Reflections
After the 1999 National Conference on Women and HIV/ AIDS
by Pam

The 1999 National Conference on Women and HIV/ AIDS was held in Los Angeles, California from October 9-12. The conference was attended by people who are infected and/or affected by HIV/AIDS from across the United States and Canada. There were about 600 scholarships available and I was of several women from Chicago who received one. At first, it was difficult to make the choice to go to Los Angeles. A vacation on the West Coast is one thing; but, to go and search for answers in dealing with the virus within is another thing altogether. After a great deal of soul-searching I chose to go and look for information and hopefully some new treatments or breakthroughs.

At first, it was difficult to make the choice to go to Los Angeles. A vacation on the West Coast is one thing; but, to go and search for answers in dealing with the virus within is another thing altogether. After a great deal of soul-searching I chose to go and look for information and hopefully some new treatments or breakthroughs.

I arrived at the convention center and immediately recognized some familiar faces from past conferences and even some women from Chicago. I met a woman who was circulating material concerning a web-site she published dealing with HIV positive women who are sexually active. Her internet Г’magazineГ“ is entitled DENTATA. I recognized the name because my boyfriend had submitted a love poem about me to the magazine and it had been published in the premier issue. I knew that Susan was a lesbian and had initially thought she would be a rough looking Г’dykeГ“. When I realized this lady was the publisher; I was shocked. To my surprise Susan was a demure, sweet young lady. I introduced myself and we laughed and delighted in the Г’worldГ“ we lived in.

This Òsmall worldÕÕ atmosphere had begun earlier when I checked into my hotel and had discovered who my roommate was. Beri and I had first met over four years ago, in Chicago, in a support group I was the facilitator of. Beri is a former IV drug user who had been in denial of being at risk for several years. She had come to the support group in an effort to face the truth and accept that she had the virus. Beri and I had discovered we had someone in common. I had gotten the virus from having sex with an old boyfriend who was an IV drug user. Beri had known him prior to our relationship and had been the first person to start him on IV drug use. Now over four years after learning this information we both were at the National Conference and were roommates. The anger and hurt one deals with in accepting the virus is eventually replaced with a determined will to live.

As you will discover through reading this article; it does not matter how you acquire the virus. What matters is how you live with it. I met another old acquaintance who typifies this will to live. She is positive; her husband is negative and she is also the mother of twins who are negative. I first met her at another convention a few years ago when her twins were just babies. She writes for a magazine in California and leads what most people would consider a normal life. The subject of pregnancy and HIV/AIDS is intense and controversial. It was the focus of several seminars and I learned a great deal of facts.

The transmission of HIV from a pregnant woman to her fetus is known as perinatal transmission. This can occur prior to delivery, during delivery or from breast feeding. In 1997 an estimated 7,000 HIV infected women gave birth in the United States. Without intervention 15-30% of these infants could become HIV positive. Recent studies have shown that administering the drug AZT prior to delivery can reduce this risk to less than 10%. These findings have given HIV positive women the opportunity to have healthy babies. The most important factor being that the pregnant woman knows she is HIV-positive prior to giving birth. This has created a dilemma amongst HIV-positive women/families. It goes back to the desire to lead a normal life. A few years ago I got pregnant and could not go through with it. Now, women have a real choice to make. I have a good friend who is pregnant. Both her and her husband are HIV- positive and they have chosen to have a baby. The reduction in probability of having an infected baby and the progress made in medications have given people with HIV/AIDS the possibility of living a long, productive and yes, normal life.

Leading a normal life with HIV/AIDS is an extremely important issue. However, more important than that is prevention of the virus altogether. Women are one of the fastest growing groups to be infected with the virus. The disease is becoming increasingly common amongst younger women- especially women of color. In 1996 AIDS became the third leading cause of death in women of reproductive age and the number one cause of death of African-American women of that age. The symptoms that could serve as warning signals of infection may be ignored because many women do not perceive themselves at risk. Symptoms include recurrent yeast infections, pelvic inflammatory disease, abnormal changes in cervical tissue, genital warts, and severe mucosal herpes infections. It is possible for a person infected with HIV to not show signs for extended periods of time. Some people within a few weeks of becoming infected show flu-like symptoms. I remember getting sick and having strep throat but not in a million years did I ever dream I was infected. I listened to the news and knew of the epidemic, but never dreamed I was at risk. I was having unprotected sex with my boyfriend and did not know of his IV drug use. I found out because I went with a girlfriend who thought she was possibly positive and we both were tested. She was negative and I, the one Г’withoutГ“ risk was positive. Safe sex through condom use and several other methods is vital. I attended a HIV lesbian seminar to learn what I could about the virusГ• transmission in this area. I found out that only 5 cases have been reported to the Center for Disease Control. I wanted to know about safe-sex practices during oral sex. Most case workers and sex educators will advise the use of a barrier during oral sex. They recommend a dental dam or plastic wrap to prevent mouth to vaginal contact.

It is very uncommon for these measures to be utilized. Another recommended preventative is to have sex in the light to see what your partner looks like. Although, most people do not like to think about it. It is imperative that people practice safe-sex methods and regularly get tested for sexually transmitted diseases or STDs. A perfect example of how the risk factor comes into play occurred one night at the hotel I stayed at. I was enjoying a soak in the hot tub, next to the pool, with several other women from the conference. All of us were HIV-positive and there were men getting in the hot tub and asking us for dates etcetera. They were unaware that we were attending the conference. One man brushed against my leg Г’accidentallyГ“ and I jumped out of the water and left. I am mentioning this because no one knows who has it. The danger is out there.

There were other people at the conference who I enjoyed speaking with. One group was called M.A.P. - Mothers of AIDS Patients. These mothers were a joy to behold. They each gave me a hug and we discussed my parentsГ• support and I left their table with tears in my eyes and a wonderful feeling of support.

I was told of a story about a very ill woman who attended the conference against her doctorГ•s wishes. She felt the need to be there to either add support or receive it. She passed away during the conference and was an amazing example of courage.

One woman proudly told me that this conference was a history making moment. She had learned that never before had so many HIV-positive women come together in one event.

Leaving Los Angeles and the convention I was filled with emotions. I had overcome my original fear of going and come away with some useful information and a rejuvenated sense of hope. I did not find a miracle cure. I do know that the battle is always with me. But, most of all, I found that women with HIV/AIDS have a great deal of support, and the opportunity to live a normal life.